Some days, I just stare at the countertop
The solemn clock watches.
Other days, I gaze out the window
If I’m lucky, the trees wave.
The clouds float away-
As effortlessly as time.
I try to find something to think about-
A sin, a heartbreak, perhaps a crime.
I fail miserably.
I sigh, disappointed in myself.
I’m unable to find the source of my despair
Yet again.
I try to count my blessings-
Friends, family, a house;
Nice things.
They fade from view…
And here I am yet again
Spiralling.
The darkness around me saturates
Isolating me.
I’ve actually gotten quite used to this!
So now I enjoy the fall
As I’m sucked further-
Into the abyss.
